What is an essential change I have made in my life that supports me to live at my natural weight after years of feeling stuck and unhappy about my body and my food?
A key change I made is that now I ask myself powerful, empowering questions every day. This strategy keeps my brain seeking fresh inspiration and delight and frees me from a sentence of being condemned to failure by repeating the same mistakes over and over.
In a More Beautiful Question, author Warren Berger, says that a beautiful question is “an ambitious yet actionable question that can begin to shift the way we perceive or think about something – and that might serve as a catalyst to bring about change.” A good question is like “a lever used to pry open the stuck lid on a paint can.”
Where are you stuck? Are you wanting to but not eating healthy foods? Are you wanting to, but not succeeding at loving your body? Still eating junk food instead of feeling your emotions? Stuck in stressful thoughts going around in your mind?
Notice the quality and tone of the questions you are currently asking yourself every day. Does the question lead to inspiration and motivation or just the same old heavy feeling of sadness and disappointment?
There are 2 ways you can look at a question, one is disempowering and the other is empowering.
Disempowering questions do not lead anywhere; they are dead end questions.
Imagine, there you sit in a cold, sparse room; a single light bulb glaring in your eyes, blinding you to the face of the interrogator. The interrogator takes advantage of the situation by making you feel very, very uncomfortable. There is an assumption of guilt.
The goal of the interrogator is to trick you; to catch you in a mistake and get you to admit bad behavior. The ultimate goal of the interrogator is to punish you.
Using disempowering questions that are negative and judgmental create fear, resentment and victimhood.
How many times have you asked yourself – What is wrong with me? Why am I so stupid? Why am I so fat and miserable and ugly? Why can’t I just lose weight?
The thing about your brain is that when it is working 100% correctly it’s mission is to find answers to the questions you pose.
The Curious Scientist
Empowering questions offer a different way of seeing our lives, or our problem. They open us up to creating new possibilities.
Empowering questions assume innocence and are driven by curiosity. You might say there are no assumptions in an empowering question. They open up a space for appreciation, compassion, inquiry, discovery, and insight.
Imagine your classroom is visited by a fun scientist – say or Bill Nye, the Science Guy or Albert Einstein. He leads the questioning with curiosity. Asking open-ended, positive, and thought-provoking questions. The goal is to stimulate possibilities.
What is your habit? Are you the Interrogator or the Curious Scientist?
Do you want to be empowered to find a way out of your weight loss struggle?
Empowering questions do just that; empower us; help us discover answers and allow for creative solutions. They also give us full responsibility for everything in our lives. We find the answers inside.
When was the last time you asked yourself any of these questions?
How can I honor my body today?
How can I add more healthy veggies to my plate?
Why am I so amazing?
What am I really hungry for?
How can I add more fun to my day?
How can I make this work?
How is this situation perfect for me?
How can I find the courage to face this day without overeating?
If you give your brain a chance to answer these questions, you may find something new to think and do.
I suggest you start a new habit of asking yourself 3 daily questions.
1. How do I want to feel today?
2. What would I like to learn today?
3. How can I be more loving toward myself?
You can act as the harsh interrogator, or the curious scientist.
One will open your mind to possibilities and the other will condemn you to disempowerment and disappointment.
I hope you take up the practice of asking open-ended, empowering questions every day.
As a life coach, I am trained in asking the best questions! If you feel stuck and can’t find a way out, reach out. I have a program to help.